Day one of three where I have to be in work by nine. I'm ok for the most part, but... Yeah, I don't like mornings (almost wrote Mondays... It isn't Monday today).

Got a dress rehersal that I have to be on stage for by four. That's why I'm doing the morning shift.

I've read Twilight. I will be watching the movie. I probably won't enjoy it (if my ranting to Ru was anything to go by).

I want more Atlantis and NCIS. Just cause I'm happy that Rodney got the girl. :D :: Claps like a happy performing seal ::

Work now. Ugh.

Rach xxx

OMG! MY 2500th POST!!!

I'd like to thank God, my parents, all my fandoms, all my RL fandoms, all my friends and especially you. Yes, you, the person reading this post. Because, lets face it, you rock!

Also, I'd like to thank Lampeter library for letting me go on their net there when it was shitty dial up and only one computer there.

I would post a load of my old entries under cuts, but my spelling has seriously gone down the pan since leaving school. Also, I'm afraid of petty, selfish, shallow me.

However, this post shall have links to things, and requests (cause OMFG I need these things), and a general love in. :D

So, first a link.



OK, not so much of a link as a YouTube screen. It's me, drunkenly singing. If you like, you may listen and laugh... (Of course, I find it hard to listen to it... Like, painfully hard, but listen, point and laugh! :D)

Now, songs I want you to listen to (then delete and buy the originals to support the artists). (Change xx to tt.)

Reel Big Fish - There Is Nothing Like A Dame
My Chemical Romance - All I Want For Christmas Is You
Hairspray 2007 Movie Cast - You Can't Stop The Beat (OMFG the Jive Erin and Austin to this? FTW!!!)
Miley Cyrus - 7 Things
Korn - Kidnap the Sandy Claws

Nightmare Revisited? Gonna get. The Korn track rocks, as does the Flyleaf track... It's a bit sad though... Prefer the FOB version, cause it's so upbeat, but yaay music!!! :D

On the note of music, has anyone got a karaoke version of Kidnap the Sandy Claws? Sounds like a weird request, but I don't want Zia to sing Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered in a Christmas show cause it's in the most awkward place and I'd rather have all three of the witches have another song together than have Zia randomly sing at the start of the fourth scene before you actually know that she's chasing a guy (also, she sings 'What Lola Wants' at the end, which is the total opposite of Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered cause Lola is about getting the guy, Bewitched is about being in love and being fucked over slightly by it).

...

And Bewitched, Bothered and Bewildered is one of my favourite songs and I don't want her to murder it...

Anyways, this is the end of the 2500th post. I hope you enjoyed it (and I will most probs add to it with pictures and icons... Dunno yet...)

Work.

Rach xxx

So yeah, my belly hates me. Just randomly in drama, at like 7:20, I start having tummy pains. I've felt sick because of them. I'm having them now. They just hurt and are making me feel sick. What are they?

I just don't know. :(

Sang my duet with Hannah, with only one fuck up (I forgot we were both singing one part), and both solos, but I'm really hating Goldfinger... I wish I'd done Diamonds are Forever, but with singing Diamond are a Girl's Best Friend I didn't want people to think I had a diamond fetish or something.

Need to find a dress though. Chris is going to Carms tomorrow, so I asked her to find out how much renting a nice dress would be. That way I can either buy a nice one on eBay, or rent one. :)

My head hurts too. :(

Ashes to Ashes watching, then bed.

Rach xxx

Ok, so who watched the Joseph show on BBC1? How totally wicked was it that Lee won? I loved Lee (anyone who's connected to PotO is like a good person by my book, until they start showing arsewipe tendancies...)(Not picking on anyone! :D). Keith was good too but Lee. Fucking hell Lee rocked so much!!! :D

Last night was ok. We did the Midsummer music stuff with LAMPS (the things I've been dreading for the past month or so cause I'm shit with learning stuff nowadays). Mark got jealous... Not that I was singing with Jack, but that I kissed his cheek (not the lips, but the cheek!) and gave him a hug. Totally ok with the fact that we were singing about loving each other ( :: Pukes :: The guy isn't my type!), but jealous at the whole kiss thing... It coulda been a hell of a lot worse! :: Pants :: The solo was ok. Couldn't remember half my lyrics so I kept going back to my copy of the words, walking around stage feeling frustrated (the reasoning is twofold, 1 - I was Eliza from My Fair Lady telling Freddie to stop being an arsewipe pansy and actually showing me some loving, not just saying it to my face, 2 - cause I knew that I knew the words, but I couldn't get them out in time).

Things went well. I wore cat ears during the audience participation bits (they had to sing with us... poor people!), glittery deelie boppers for the raffle (I asked if I could do the raffle and Zia said I could, so woo-hoo!) and a tiara for Dancing Queen (cause I did the dance... poor people who had to dance)... It seemed like a good idea at the time! :D I almost laughed my guts out during 'You Raise Me Up'. Jack started singing in some weird accent... Julie was most confused too.

Poor Bethan felt worried before going on, cause the piano was up on blocks, and Bethan's tiny. She was playing the Glasgow love theme from Love, Actually. Mark liked Fiona's solo (dunno which one) and Hannah's solo (which was really good! I just wish I watched her monologue).

I actually kinda crumbled after I got off stage after 'Show Me' (my solo). I got to the bottom of the stairs leading to the Old Hall and curled up into a little ball. I was shaking and everything. My nerves are forever wrecked. I seriously thought I was gonna die on stage at times, cause I had never sung through my solo without a goof. I would always forget a lyric or something stupid like that, and it set me on edge everytime I did that. So I curled up into a ball and shook for a moment. Almost cried cause it was over so quickly and I hadn't felt confident at all. I got the notes (I was told that by a few fair people) but how I felt was like... Well, you had to dig for my confidence I felt so bad.

Everyone else was really good though. Like really proper good. Ruth dying was like Amazing (we did Who Killed Cock Robin... She was Robin).

I just wish I was that confident person I was in Sleeping Beauty... Hell, I was confident in Alice. Why the hell am I being so unconfident with lyrics and words and stuff? I'm remembering tunes, but the words with them are like dying in my head. Why?!

Ugh.

Spent the day with Mark... Well, the afternoon. Watched Sleepy Hollow, then had dinner and watched Any Dream Will Do (the Joseph show)... And did the normal things that we do when I'm in Harlech... It was nice, just chilling out. It was really warm there though (or maybe my shirt made me feel warmer... Or maybe it's to do with that time getting closer...). I love being hugged, and held, and kissed, and everything Mark does with me (to me ;D). We talked about the whole Grr aspect he had (I can see where he's coming from, cause I'm the same), and why I sometimes want arguments (reason: the making up :D) and his reticence of arguing (good sometimes but too often and it's a cause for concern)... Then we chilled out and thought of nothing bad.

He's my Phantom. :D Raoul is a pansy assed wanker in the version I've watched... I mean, he just meanders in, all, 'Whoo hoo, my parents have money and I'm gonna fall in love with my old friend because she's like totally popular now cause of her voice,' when the Phantom's been there, helped her, educated her... Ok, so he's kinda a daddy figure to her, but she was an orphan cause her really daddy died... She's always gonna be looking for that father figure. Might as well be the Phantom. Ok, so he liked murdering people (and I think that Meg Giry is his daughter with Madam Giry, cause they were kinda the same age...), and sending letters, but that just meant that he was in touch with his feelings.

Mark doesn't kill people (thank god!) but he's... the best ever. I'm loved up at the moment ok? :D

Right, I best be to bed. Good night.

Rach xxx

:: Bangs head against the keyboard ::

Today has been an ok day.

:: Looks at the lyrics of "All I Ask Of You" ::

:: Groans, blushes, groans again ::

Didn't do too bad at work... Didn't do fantastically though. Wendy was nice about my hair (It was up in a half pony tail) and was nice to me (which was really really weird cause I'm not used to nice from people... I'm used to the strange looks they give me when I do something weird/different/out of the normal practice of things)... Told me to be a bit more involved though (I am a team player! ... Dunno if that makes me happy or confused).

Watched them record 'The Edge of Love' today... I am so glad I'm not doing media now, cause the Sparrow would be loving that, and making us go watch etc etc.

Need to practice my songs. Need to learn the words to All I Ask of You. To learn words I have to find the lyrics/listen to the music over and over again, and I've given my copy of the lyrics to Barbara (yes, that was a very clever idea at the time, but not so much anymore, as I've been asked to learn words). I'm ok with the solo (bit shakey in places but it'll tidy up in the next two weeks).

Ok, just printed out the lyrics... Will learn it at work tomorrow... Actually Jack said he wanted a word on Friday, but never spoke of it afterwards. Random.

OMG Harlech totally rocked!! Mark and I had a romantic lunch, a fun (alcohol fulled) game of Truth or Dare (which was... mindblowingly amazing!!!). I got up there Saturday, I was really tired, almost had a nap when I got in (but didn't)... We went shopping after a few hours. And we lit candles (and played Truth Or Dare until after midnight... Almost one-ish actually). It was pretty and romantic.

Sunday was just as great, but in a different way. It was softer. Saturday was rougher, more needy, but Sunday... We had a romantic lunch, watched movies, listened to music. It was... nice. And I don't mean nice in a bad way, but as a positive thing. I loved it. I liked being treated like a girl, and being wined and dined... And we danced. :) It was amazing.

I got a lil tipsy that night though, so for about an hour after I went to bed I was giggling for no reason... Mark thought it was funny at times. :D

It was a good weekend!!!!

And OMG how much do I love The Phantom's booming voice in the Il Muto/Poor Fool part of the movie/song? :D Love it so much!!! Damn it all for Raoul getting the girl... I would have rathered the Phantom. 'Sorry Raoul, you seem like the type of guy who'd take longer to do his hair than I would... It's Erik for me!' :D

Damn her for being a soprano though. :(

Rach xxx

Top A dudes... That is the top C (the high Doh in the Doh a deer a female deer song) but the A above it. The soprano teritory. The scary, 'OMG WTF?!' notes that people like Jo and Clare can reach... Serious, Jo has the most amazing voice and I wish I could go as high as her.

Ruth's gone to stay with Julie, so I have my room to myself tonight.

I won't be doing Popular, so can everyone who sings (or listens to musicals) send me tracks (or tell me titles of tracks) for me to find a song by like last week. Famous songs, that someone around here will be most likely to have. I'm a mezzo, so top A is like pushing it (although it was a very strong note). So, send me your songs! :D

:: Hugs ::

Need food. Not eaten a proper meal since lunch...

Rach xxx

I had a huge rant about Zia in my head, but she's a poopyhead that doesn't deserve more than a paragraph. Just let it be said that she has no idea how it feels to be an alto learning notes when there are sopranos singing at the same time.

Work was a fucking blast today! So many people!!!

Starting extra hours on the 30th. I do Mondays when I don't go to Harlech, and Wednesdays when I do go to Harlech. So every other week. :D

Jake and Ruth are watching Monty Python's Flying Circus. I'm sitting at the computer.

My nose hurts.

Seeing Mark tomorrow. Yaay! :D

:: Sleeps ::

Love you all.

Rach xxx

OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG etc etc

I'm singing 'All I Ask Of You' in drama with Jack... All I Ask of You is like the sweetest song in the whole musical (after Music of the Night) and I get to sing a duet!!! With a guy... Ok, this doesn't sound like a big thing, but I've never sung a duet with anyone that was male that wasn't a) family or b) in a choir. So this is like Wow!!!! :D

...

Course now that I've written it here I need to kinda slip it past Mark without him getting to angsty. He won't I don't think, but that lil bit of doubt is like, 'Urk.' Cause he thought I was flirty last year back stage... :: Shrugs :: I dunno, men!

Jo was in as well, which rocked, cause we were sops together (we both hated the high notes in this one song we're doing... Some Westlife -- Oh! You Raise Me Up, but we have like four soprano-y kinda people (Jo is a proper sop, I just fake it) and then the rest are fucking altos who, whilst they sound nice, I couldn't hear... Then again there was a slight case of screeching that Zia seems to like. But OMG I get to sing a Phantom Of The Opera song!!!

:: Is chuffed ::

Phantom of the Opera baby yeah!

Worked sucked. No more to be said.

Seeing Mark tomorrow for the first time in weeks!!! So fucking excited! :D

Bed, cause I need to be up early tomorrow cause the bus leaves at 7:30 and the train leaves at 9:10... I know! Evil times, but more time spent with Mark is better! :D

Rach xxx

So, I didn't go to Halrech this weekend... After the panic Mark put me through on Monday I thought it best to break with routine for a while and stay home... Which was a kinda good idea on paper, but I really miss him, and I couldn't just pop up there for the weekend when I said I wouldn't cause he has to tell some woman that I'm coming up for a visit. So Friday I got kinda depressed, I'm a size bigger than Julie (Ruth's best friend) so I went kinda "falling rocket" on her and Ruth, and on Saturday it kinda happened again (but technically my fault, we went to TK Maxx, which has pretty dresses up to size like 16, 18 if you're really lucky, but then it's black after that for the very bigger sizes, which didn't help my mood). But! Julie said, "Look, lets go to Evans," cause they have pretty clothes for the bigger sizes, and the boots actually get around your big fat calves.

Got the vocal/piano selections book of "Wicked" but it misses out the best bits (like the 'There's been some confusion...' at the start of "What Is This Feeling?" and the chorusy bit in it, and "Dancing Through Life" is only up until Fiyero stops singing and Boc (or is it Bic?) asked Galinda for a dance but she deflects him onto Nessa... Yeah, the best bits... And "Defying Gravity" is totally changed! :: Sobs :: Oh well...) but still good!!! I've just been, well I can't say reading, but it's been open and I've just been singing along with it... (They actually miss out March of the Witch Hunters and Sentimental Man, but I don't like Sentimental Man so that's ok)...

Got red eyeshadow in Carms too!!! Well, it's more for Ruth when I do her Frank make up (watch the Helena video, you'll see what I mean)... And I got Corpse Bride on DVD, and the Blues Brothers soundtrack (we have it on tape in mum's car, so it's like, 'Omfg yaaaay!!!')

Oh!! I held Elliw's baby on Friday! She's such a cutie! And I got all broody and seriously she's so cute and small... She cried after a while, cause she had only just woken up and hadn't had her feed... Oh but so cute!!! And awwwwwwwwwww!!!! :: Grins madly ::

Sunday was boring... No Mark. :( But I did see his mum. Had a chat with her. She rocks so much!!! We chatted about Mark, and how I was down here next weekend too, so he's gonna be like, 'I'm so bored,' and like a bear with a sore tooth when she calls. He's not... Well, not with me, but that's what you get for being the fiancée (still weird me calling myself that) and not the mother... :D I get the cute, 'I miss you' stuff (which I secretly love!) and the talking about things that make me blush in public (ie not in my own room by myself)... But I go up to see him the last weekend of term, and he's back the week after, and I have him for three weeks!!! And we can do things and be happy and not tired from travelling (seriously, Saturdays after travelling to Harlech on the train, I get to bed by about eleven... Saturday just gone I went to bed at about one ish!)

Right need to get changed cause Ruth needs her purse... I don't actually know where it is... :|

Rach xxx

I'm engaged!!!! Like proper official now. My parents know, and were like, 'Cool.' I told them that he proposed on the top of the tower at Harlech castle (even though he hadn't really - ask my rl friends) and I told Chris that and she was like, 'Oh that's so sweet!' and stuff like that... I basically bounced into drama. Twas fun.

And I'm on the committee. For drama. Pat elected me, and Chris seconded it. Motion carried. I am now the youngest person on the committee. I'm there as the "voice of the young people." Yeah right... Anyways, Chris (lil Chris, not my Chris) is writing a panto, and I'm on the subcommitee for that too. I'm a busy beaver now.

I think I'm gonna go watch Clerks 2. :D

Rach xxx

Many things to come your way in this post tonight:

* Advent Icons (yaaay!!! :D). I've decided to make three a day, cause iconning is fun! :D
* Meme (snagged from boombangbing)
* Life update
* Performance and costume pictures (some are like totally fucked up though cause mum can't handle cameras at time! :D)

This list might not exactly come in that order, but... Meh! :D

---

Icons! :D The advent season is on us, the start of the Christian year (cause it's the lead up to the birth of Jesus, so w00t! :D)(Ok... I just went l33t... Help!) and somehow, over the years, people got calanders with choccies cause their parents spoilt them... Anyways, in the spirit of the season, I shall give choccie goodness in the form of icons! :D I hope you like them! :D

Three sets, to be served everyday from now until the twenty fifth of December (or the twenty fourth, depends on what I'm up to in those last few days)



( More )

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Now, the meme...

1. Bold the names of guys you'd definitely shag.
2. Italicize the names of guys you might shag after a little persuasion.
3. Leave the guys you don't know of (or wouldn't want to shag) alone.
4. Strike the guys you wouldn't touch with a ten foot pole.
5. ADD ONE OF YOUR OWN AT THE END.
( Marry, shag, kill )

---

Life... is kinda ok at the moment. Mark and I are still together. I still work. Still fat. No big diff really... It's kinda strange... There was a load of things that I wanted to talk about over the week, but looking back on them they all seem kinda... inconsequencal (totally spelt wrong, but no worries) I suppose. Don't know why though. Nothing big really seems to happen to me anyways.

:: Hugs her flist :: I kept up with your lives. :) Twas fun. :)

So yeah... Did a few extra hours on Monday. Got some new clothes on Saturday... Nothing big or new.

---

Cinderella fucking rocked!!! I messed up my opening song on both nights (second night I did the verses the wrong way and I couldn't remember the words) but after that I was kinda ok. Hannah and Julie said two lines at once on the first night, and I got so confused that I just stared out into the audience and said, 'Too many questions... It's all so confusing.' It was, and we missed out most of that scene. And the second night it went in the wrong order, and I couldn't hear Hillary (our prompt), so I said to the audience, 'Even fairy godmothers have memory lapses,' or words to that effect... And these people paid to watch this?

Second night, the curtains didn't open for ages, so Julie and I started adlibbing, saying how we'd fix the King's eyes next (cause he couldn't see very well), and it was fun!!! :D I pissed off Ruth. During the Sneeze Polka I was poking her with the magic wand (on the second night, I didn't think about doing it on the first night), and it was so funny, cause she was looking round, trying to figure out what the hell was poking her (cause the Fairy Godmother was invisible! :D) Ruth is way more funnier than I am.

Jack was pissy on the second night (god knows why) but everyone else was ok... Mark's parents came on the first night (they heard me sing and saw me act... oh the poor people!!!) Supposedly I have "talent"... Uh... yeah, right. The moment I have talent can you call me and let me know?

Ugh, bed soon... Didn't notice the time!!! Pics of Cinderella tomorrow (or later today... whatever) along with the fourth advent icon.

So long, and goodnight. :)

Rach xxx

Ugh, hate LJ posting stuff. :: Gets pissy :: I was just happily blabbering on about being in love with Mark and going to see him tomorrow and taking West Wing with me cause he loves it already, when LJ (or maybe my keyboard) eats my post and auto saves when there's nothing on the screen! I mean, wtf?

I got stuff in Cardigan today... Monday I'm gonna try and find out some stuff about getting contact lenses (I wanna try and stop depending on my glasses... This does mean that I go to bed earlier and remember to take them out... :| I have the worst memory). I was trying out my purple/blue fake eyelashes, and I went downstairs, and I saw my dad first, and he was actually quite complimentary about me... which is weird, cause usually he says, 'Yes, very pretty,' in that offhand way, but he actually said that I look prettier without my glasses on... So yeah. That kinda struck me as odd, cause he never does stuff like that.

So now I have my own copy of Phantom of the Opera (the Gerad Butler/Emmy Rossum one) so I'm happy (Mark said something about running off with is for a few nights so then his parents can watch it)

Did I tell you that Mark's parents are *thinking* of coming to watch Cinderella? The mere fact that they're thinking about it scares me. I don't want the nerves thinking, 'OMG they're gonna be out there, judging me and my voice and my outfit and the way I move and think and speak,' cause that is not a good mindset! I don't mind Mark and my mum being there, cause mum's been watching me perform since The Wizard of Oz (hmm... I wonder if I could persuade Zia to do 'Wicked'?), and Mark knows how ott I can be, but his parents? They just know I'm loud (*wink wink*)

Gonna go finish watching Phantom. Night night. :D

Oh, before I go, are Peter and Erin out of Strictly? Thank you and goodnight! :D

Rach xxx

Stolen from seramercury



I'm a Trek-nerd. It makes me happy (when skies are grey)

It's been raining here. I hate rain. Rain is eeeeeeeeevil... And it's windy. Very windy. I hate windy days. Wind is evil. Rain is evil. I seriously only like snow and sun (and then when it's sunny it can't be to hot, humid and sunny, otherwise I start complaining again - Mark keeps joking saying, 'I should take you to South Africa, then you'll never complain about the weather here,' but at the mo I like complaining).

I have work in just under 3/4 of an hour, but I need to find something small to munch on, even if it's... well, we do have those mince pies at work. But I don't wanna eat all of them (we only have three, but all the other munchables there are chocolate covered, and I don't wanna eat chocolate).

What says you all about having a CSI: Miami advent calander icon set this year? ... I could do a multi-fandom calander... I'm doing VAMB's Secret Santa though... I should have time, unless I'm roped in to do other things... Like, I need to finish learning my lines (I'm performing in two weeks - hey, hang on, Zia said we only had two weeks last week and it's two weeks tonight when we go on! Stupid cow).

Right, need to get my stuff together to go to work... Somedays I really hate working there, and other times I love it (especially after a good day's money... :: Shifty eyes :: What do you mean, I'm just like Anya from Buffy? I just like making lots and lots of money! :D)

Rach xxx

Borrowed from the fantastic agentrosecotton:



And I've not been to school in like a year and a bit... I retained knowledge (apart from deriving the area of a right angled triangle... I wasn't good in maths! :D)

Still loving the Wicked soundtrack. :)

Mark came round today... @D Twas sooooo good! Mark is very good with everything. :)

Practice was... held with just four of us (but we had the Prince, and he's a fucking laugh! :D And Hannah? So fucking cool! And Julie rocks anyways!)

Mum owes me a quid cause I had to pay her library fine. :(

The dog's been barking at me for no reason again... He hates me.

Rach xxx

OMFG, the CSI: Miami game is hard (and I'm on beginner!! :| Not fair!) but oh so good when you figure something out without Calleigh telling me that she's left like a million and one hints in my file. It's... hard, but there is Yelina!!! Yaaay Yelina! :D

Shopping today was goooooooooooood! Got two pairs of shoes, got to Carms on a child return (I'm nineteen!), got huuuuuuuge fairy wings (they're lush), a fairy wand, season five of Family Guy, the CSI: Miami game and some undies (a set... kinda). I had a good day! One pair of shoes cost me three quid (I have a green pair, exactly the same style, that I got when they first came out for a tenner, so seven pounds off is like yaaaaaaaaaay!).

Mark came with me too, so he helped me shop (even though I didn't trust him much with his choices... Dunno why, cause I trust him with most things, but shoes? :: Shrugs :: Must be because I love my feet so much [she says, buying size seven toe shows - they fit, but they pinch]). and he carried my wings around (I wore them when we got to Lampeter, but I didn't want to when I was in Carms, cause like way too many people around!)

OOOOOOOOOOOOOH!!! Was watching Afterlife and omg Robert go bye bye before he gave Alison his book thing that he didn't write the conclusion of. So sad. And Jan and Anton are out of Strictly Come Dancing... The judges were pissing about with Brendon again (but he has a point, there is favrotism. Some dances were sloppy in places and they got like eights and nines, and I was like, 'WTF?'... Me and Mark were bitching whilst watching).

Going to bed. It's after half one... :|

Rach xxx

Monday I have practice. After "school". Well, after four pm. We (as in everyone who isn't an adult, or is an adult but seems like one of the younger ones) need to practice. Like major big time. Zia keeps stopping and starting, and jumping about from scene to scene. I'm gonna try and learn my lines tonight (well, tomorrow night) cause I need to learn them. And I need to learn my songs and harmonies, and my blocking. Four weeks tonight will be the first show... My dress is pretty (there shall be pictures one day soon).

Autumn's been asked to leave (which she's done). She wanted to, but Zia and Autumn's parents were putting pressure on her (and Autumn is a girl not to pressure). So Laura's taking her place (a student) and then Bethan, who was the Blue Faun in Sleeping Beauty, is the Second Guard. Laura and Jack (Gerturde and Prince Charming respectivly... obviously) weren't there, and Zia got all bitchy, and Jo and I (I had a bitching bodning sesh with her, she rocks!) had a bitching session.

OMG Zia had this major evil dress, that looked like a nighty meshed with curtains. It was so bad! And she was... showing slight peanuts... It was so fucking bad man... So Jo and I bitched... It was so great!! :D

Shopping tomorrow! :D

Rach xxx

Here's how it works:
1. Reply to this post if you want me to tell you how awesome you are.
2. Watch my journal over the next few days for a post just about you and why you rock my socks. (It might take me through next week, but I WILL do it)
3. Post these instructions in your journal and give your friends a much needed dose of love and adoration. :)

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Drama, I know most of the songs (both alto and soprano parts - and I'm not a soprano), where people are standing, when people need to be listening... I just need to learn my dialogue and then I'd know more than Zia (who is the producer/director, and who doesn't need to learn much cause she doesn't have a main part). I mean, she's changing things left right and centre, the bows at the end were set to music but, 'That's too hard' (as in she can't figure it out cause she can't read) so that's messed up and I don't get the bow where I expect it to be. :(

My dress is gonna be so pretty though, and it has a train thing (lots of material at the back) and omg I just love it... Even though it isn't made yet. I can imagine things well! :D

Getting my hair done Monday, so yaaaaaaaaaay! Need Ruth to tidy up her stuff though cause the room is a fucking tip and for once it isn't because of me!

You know, telling me major secrets is a bad idea, cause I get so happy (or sad) that people give me weird looks. :: Looks warily at everyone :: No-one's pregnant/engaged/half dying/dead/a murderer/etc on my flist?

Seeing Mark tomorrow, yaaaaaaaaaaay!!! :D

Rach xxx

So... I love CSI: Miami at the moment. Like, really love it! Almost to the point where it passes Voyager in my love list... It kinda does at times, espesh when Ben Browder and Robert Beltran are in the same ep! So, been watching them loads. I have like eight eps of season one to watch then I've seen all of them (actually, lie. I need to watch ten eps, but the other two eps are on the first half of the dvd set of season one). So far my fave ep has been the last ep of disk 4 (if you think of the two halves as a whole) where these inmates escape and one's a serial killer (kinda) and the other is a child molester kinda thing (he was really weird, and sent to jail eariler on in the season) and then Horatio catches the weird evil child loving dude who's like totally creepy, and Calleigh catches the serial killer and it all effin rocks!!! :D

Also, in drama we're doing Cinderella. I'm the Fairy Godmother. The part "has to be Rachel!" was what Zia said. You read it and you'd think it better for my sis. There is not a funny bone left in my body. I can't act funny anymore, or sound funny or anything. It's as if a fun loving vampire (as in a vampire who feeds off the funniness of someone, not one who likes fun) has come and taken every ounce of my funniness and gobbled it all up. The only reason I got it was because they wanted me to be the Fairy Godmother. And I'm happy that I am... It's just I don't do good characters well. I'm evil through and through. I do trolls and beasties and evil queens who have a thing for chopping off heads. I don't do good fairies!


My sis would be better anyways. You shoulda heard her when we were just reading through the script. She was amazing. She could act that part standing on her head... She could act any part of this... panto... (dunno what to really call it cause it ain't drama, but it isn't really panto) standing on her head. She's a born comedienne, who can write amazingly, who looks way prettier than me and is a hell of a lot more confident than me. She doesn't care about what anyone says about her. I worry about what mum and dad think of me. She's just totally at ease with herself, and I'm all over the shop, not knowing what the hell to do.

...

Wow, maudlin much? It can't be good. I mean, I have a sister who is everything (and I mean everything) I'm not and a brother who, if he actually worked, could pass everything one hundred percent. I'm the eldest, and the loser and the fatty and the awkward one who worries more than is healthy... I'm pretty sure I'm getting neurotic about things... I'm just... fucked in the head. Majorly screwed up, wired wrong. Like my hands aren't mine or something.

Got more hours at work though. All day Tuesday, Thursday and Friday. Less time home, but meh. I don't mind much. Means less washing up of the dishes (because, and my dad is the one that says this) I'm actually working, unlike my bro and sis who are only being educated... (And, if I can just mention, they get out of "work" two hours earlier than me thank you very much!) Mum's getting more stressed with Ruth answering back all the time (I don't have the guts to turn around and give mum a look of 'whatever') culminating to mum having a freak out this morning and threatening to take my rent up to fourty quid a fortnight (I'm at £20 per fortnight at the moment, which I like cause it gives me enough to get things I need/want, and have lunch during the week when I'm working)...

Plus, turned into a Pokemon fan. I'm hooked to Yellow at the moment. It's so bad that I am, but so good that I have something to do now.

And I've found a Draco/Ginny fic that I read years ago that I loved. So maudlin, self-pitying mood is leaving slowly. To make things perfect would to have Mark come in, give me a hug from behind, kiss the back of my neck, then say he was off to bed... Cause that would be perfect. The two of us together, without anyone else judging us, or going, 'Oh god I've been woken up to the sound of suction pumps' etc etc, just chilling, being happy. That's not gonna happen with me here and him at his home. Life fucking sucks.

Gonna watch CSI: Miami tomorrow. Cheer myself up.

Rach xxx

Have decided. Don't wanna work in the chippy. I was only there three and a half hours today and I wanted to kill myself after about an hour. My feet were sore (specifically my big toes), I smell of chippy and I don't really mesh well with new people (especially when they bullied my little brother for years). I'm onk with some, but others, they're younger than me, and I don't get on well with people younger than me (unless they can show that they're mature at times).

Went to drama yesterday. It was... interesting. We're doing Cinderella, and Zia wanted Jo to be Cinders (cause, omg she has the best voice ever!!!) but Jo doesn't really wanna be Cinderella... Zia wanted me to be The Fairy Godmother (the biggest role, I found out after) but I stupidly said, 'I kinda want to be Cinderella, but I don't mind what part I get' but thinking over it, I want to be the Fairy Godmother. I mean, think of all the glittery makeup I could wear!! :D And pretty dress, and servants... I mean, helpers. And a wand and almost half the lines and songs. I mean, kick ass! But I said I wanted Cinderella. Stupid Rachel!!!

Thing is, she hasn't started casting yet (cause there was only five of us there yesterday) but she wanted to have a feel of what we were feeling (that sounds so bad but anyways). Autumn said she wouldn't mind Fairy Godmother, and Zia was like, 'I don't think you have the experience for carrying the main role, as she has a lot of dialogue and solos.' My singing has gone to the pits, but she still wants me to do the Godmother. :: Is shocked ::

Right, eat dinner, then call Mark back. :)

Rach xxx

Me and Ruth have figured out why we can't practice with the tape Mrs H made us. It's like a note or two higher than the sheet music. Somehow the tape transposes it slightly, but just enough for my top F to go to top A or something stupid like that. I mean, the D Flat Major sounds wrong... And I have to go into my headvoice almost straight away, which isn't good cause it supposedly starts on a C (and on a G flat(?) at the key change). Ruth, poor dab, can't sing at all to the tape cause it is too high for her and now I'm getting nervous for tomorrow. I wanna do my hair and nails, but I can't do my nails or my hair until after work (cause I wanna curl my hair, and to do that it needs to be clean - it's clean now but after work tomorrow it'll be gross - and I wanna paint my nails, and I need to put on some make up)...

I wish Mark was here. My shoulders hurt, and his backrubs, however lousy they are at times, are really nice, cause they're from him. :: Gives everyone sickbags after that overdose of sugary sweetess ::

Work from 11 tomorrow. In Pantri then in DAR... So I'm gonna have a mug of milk, lock the doors, make sure none of the downstairs windows are open (ok, I sound anal, but I still don't like this area, and it takes ages for me to feel safe in a new house, regardless of how many people are there) and then go to bed. :: Nods ::

Night.

Rach xxx